Recently, my family lost a special lady.
My mamaw was an amazing person!
She was independent, strong-willed, and a worrier. Ha!! She would stew over little things and would make sure that everything was good before she felt better.
She also didn’t ask for help much but appreciated when she got it. If she asked for help, she needed it.
Mamaw also had the ability to survive. Her story is so full of heartache and tough times, but she always had her Bible open and her heart full.
Even with her limited education, she read the scriptures often. In fact, her kitchen table either had food or an open Bible. To her, the Bible was precious.
Her time with God was worth more than anything else and now she is with Him eternally. No doubt she is enjoying worshipping the King!
Special memory – When I was young, we always left our house early when going to church. We took Mamaw to church with us. I love how she was always ready to go church. No doubt she had been ready to go and had been waiting for our arrival.
Mother’s Day was a tough day this year. Mother’s Day is never complete without visiting Mamaw. This year I visited her grave. My heart was so full of emotions at the cemetery. I know she isn’t there yet the selfish part of me wants to go visit. I want to sit down with her and enjoy some more time but reality is, my time with her on earth is over.
After losing Mamaw, my heart was filled with so many emotions. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about if you’ve lost someone.
There was sadness and emptiness. I also had some denial (I can’t believe she’s gone) and gratitude for her life and her legacy.
The biggest emotion I felt was heartache for my Dad and his siblings. My heart is still broken for them. Watching them was one of the hardest things I have ever experienced. Even though I love her and miss her, I know Dad and his siblings were hurting much deeper than me. I don’t know what it’s like to lose a parent but from watching, I know it can’t be easy.
After experiencing a week full of taxing emotions and very little sleep, I was left wondering what God says about this emotion, this hurt, this grief that my family is experiencing. I know it is ok to hurt but what else?
There must be hope for the broken hearted. I mean God is the Comforter, right? So, how do we get the comfort that we desperately need while we hurt so deeply?
In a nutshell, this is the truth I learned about brokenheartedness; it’s real, it hurts, and Jesus was sent to heal the brokenhearted.
Being in anguish, He prayed more fervently, and His sweat became like drops of blood falling to the ground. When He got up from prayer and came to the disciples, He found them sleeping, exhausted from their grief.
Isaiah 61: 1
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
Jesus identifies with your sorrow.
He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of suffering who knew what sickness was.
He was like someone people turned away from;
He was despised, and we didn’t value Him.
Yet He Himself bore our sicknesses,
and He carried our pains;
but we in turn regarded Him stricken,
struck down by God, and afflicted.
Let’s hit the Word to see what we need to do when we are brokenhearted.
- Cry. Jesus wept. Its the shortest verse in the Bible but it packs a punch. Jesus cried for His friend who died. He loved Lazarus. We know He loved him because Jesus was heartbroken for His friend and showed it through His tears. When we lose someone close, we need to cry. It’s ok to let your emotions show. Be open with one another. The reality of human life is that brokenheartedness is expected. John 11:19, 31-36
- Get some support. During times of struggle we need to be around Godly people and we need to spend more time with Jesus. It’s ok to call on your siblings, your friends, or your kids. If you need them, they will come. Don’t hesitate to ask. The example of Jesus crying shows that it’s good to be open with our emotions to our support group. Call on them, open up and pray together. You’ll be amazed at how therapeutic this will be.
- Pray and believe. Spend time with Jesus. He came to heal the sick and brokenhearted but you have to come to Him. Jesus is sovereign over everything, including death. That means He knows about our hurt. He knows that when someone passes it will leave pain behind. He came for the broken-hearted. Open up to Jesus in prayer and allow His comfort to surround you. Jer 29:11-14
- Allow God to comfort. This ties in with no. 3. Go to Him. Ask for comfort. Then let Him comfort. If we put up barriers, we will block the good things every time. We must be intentional about receiving grace to face brokenheartedness. 2 Cor 12:9-10 Please allow God to release you from grief. John 7:37-38
- Replace sorrow with victory. If you are a believer, our citizenship is in Heaven and we will see our loved ones again. God has given us a victory that we can claim even when our heart is broken. Remind yourself of the good things of being a Christian. Phil 3:20, Isaiah 61:1-3, 58:6
Additional Reading – Ps 34 & 42, Rev 21, 1 Cor 15
I pray this will encourage you through your tough time.
I’m not a professional doctor or psychiatrist. I’m simply a person who likes to learn. If you need to speak to a professional or a pastor, don’t hesitate. Remember grief is real and there are people out there trained to help you walk through your journey.
What else have you found to be helpful during your time of grief? Leave it in the comments below.
Life is a grand total of our choices. What do you choose today?
Progress through purpose, change through choice!!
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